In the Shona culture, it is gross abomination to grossly
offend your parent or grandparent. In
the same culture, an offence against your mother or maternal grandmother is rated more serious
than one against your father. For example, if you push away your father, this
is not as serious as pushing away your mother or grandmother.
It is believed that you will experience a litany of
misfortunes if you happen to offend a parent and do not make things right by
the offended parent. These misfortunes are called Botso. The offences that rate botso
usually involve humiliation of a parent such as physical and verbal abuse,
rape, committing adultery with a stepmother or stepfather, having sexual
relations with your parent’s partner, stealing your mother’s mombe
yehumai (heifer given to a mother when her daughter marries or any
cattle that the heifer subsequently issues) and so on.
The misfortunes can be anything from loss of money and
property, the propensity of being abused
by others including strangers, mental illness, imprisonment and so on i.e. things
that generally humiliate and bring shame
to an individual. It is only after consulting traditional or faith healers that
the person is informed that his misfortunes are as a result of prior
humiliation of his parent. In other words, that he has botso.
The prescription to the problem of botso is called ‘kutanda
botso”, which literally means chasing away the botso. The process of kutanda
botso is designed in such a way that it becomes the final humiliation
of the offender, to make right the humiliation suffered by a parent because of
his previous actions.
The good news is that, in the deliverance process, the
community takes an active role in assisting the offender. If an offender, let
us call him Maguchu, was prescribed “kutanda botso” as a solution to his
problems, he approaches the Chief of the area for assistance. The Chief then
calls his subjects to a meeting to inform his them that Maguchu has to go
through “kutanda botso” for
committing such and such an offence. He gives instruction that everyone should assist
Maguchu.
Maguchu’s family and friends then dress him in torn clothes,
give him a sack and send him on his way with instructions to come back in a
month’s time. Maguchu then goes around the
district, begging for food, places to sleep and handouts of millet or rapoko or
sorghum for brewing beer. His life for that month is similar to that of a
begging vagrant.
The community, as instructed by the Chief, helps Maguchu
but after setting young children to jeer
at him. Some throw more old and torn clothes at him. The community must not
hurt him but just jeer at him. When Maguchu moves around the district, a
stranger can mistake him for a vagrant or a person with mental illness and yet
he does not have those problems.
After a month, Maguchu returns home with his sack full of millet, rapoko
or sorghum which is used to brew beer. Friends, not his family, brew the beer in
a nearby forest. People come to celebrate his return. His friends then wash him
and cloth him in brand new clothes that the friends would have bought for him.
His misfortunes will be over.
Therefore, if you see someone looking like a vagrant or have
a mental illness, it is not always that they are in the process of “kutanda
botso”. It is also a misnomer to say that someone who is facing misfortunes
“ari
kutanda botso” because “kutanda botso” is the deliverance
part and not the misfortune part. The correct expression is “ane
botso”, that is if you know that the person offended a parent.
Kutanda botso is an organized process of deliverance from botso
or misfortunes. The beauty of the custom is in how the community comes together
to assist the offender.
If you happen to offend your parent beyond limits, the best
thing is to appeal for help from their siblings, aunts and uncles. They will intercede
on your behalf and the matter will be resolved amicably before botso
is visited upon you.
#respectyourparent
#hounourthyfatherandmother
